


Entwining Forces

by Evayna



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-04
Updated: 2016-01-04
Packaged: 2018-05-11 16:18:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 831
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5633098
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Evayna/pseuds/Evayna
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Who has a more complicated family life than Leia? Relations, relationships, and the blood and force that flows between disparate bodies; none of it is easy to come to terms with.</p>
<p>Inspired by a prompt about Leia unofficially adopting Poe, and Carrie Fisher's brilliant performance.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Entwining Forces

**Author's Note:**

  * For [downlookingup](https://archiveofourown.org/users/downlookingup/gifts).



The people that raised her did a fine job. They taught her politics and ideals without oversimplifying, or trying to indoctrinate her. They knew she’d make up her own mind about anything they said. She was strong, and they celebrated that strength. But the fire in her blood, she didn’t know where it came from. Her father Bail looked nothing like her; her adoption wasn’t a secret. They let her know everyday, in different ways, how much she was wanted. Cherished and empowered, their first chosen daughter. But she could _feel_ a different family out there. The feeling was persistent and impenetrable. As a teenager she read a few books and self-diagnosed it as a manifestation of abandonment issues. It wasn’t until she was grown and had a death star or two under her belt that she realized it was the force she was feeling, it was Luke, Anakin. There was a long moment in the forest, on that little moon of Endor, where she expected to find her mother alive too.

Years later, when she was pregnant, Han got her remedies and folk-cures from across the galaxy to help with the morning sickness. Most of them definitely not legal - most of them unfortunately ineffective. But she felt his care every moment, and she lit up with hope for this life inside her. That this child would have a loving mother and father who would be there, thick and thin. When she closed her eyes she could feel the force flowing between herself and the fetus. She didn’t want the strings that connected them to ever pull too taught. Never strain because she was too far away or too unknown. She would raise this child like the Organa’s raised her. With love, and hope, and commitment.

As the First Order grew stronger, and she’d roll over restlessly in the night onto a cold expanse of bed, dark thoughts would creep in from the corners of the room. The joy of Han, and Ben, and Luke - the joy of them all together… Maybe it was too much. Maybe the love and lightness she felt in building a new family, a new life after Alderaan, was so great it tipped the balance of the force. And now the universe was balancing it back. Leaving her all alone. Struggling to keep her people alive, no idea where her loved ones were. Her son had turned against everything she believed in. The fire in her blood had passed on to him, but where her stubbornness was matched with kindness, his was overwhelmed with arrogance. Why should he be the smallest in a family of icons, when he had power enough to make his own legends? Why should he keep their name? Why should he look at the world through her same brown eyes? And Han, the fool… He thought looking at him would remind her of the son they’d lost. Didn’t he know she was reminded every time she looked in the mirror?

The Resistance called her General. No one called her mom. She felt like it all the same, delegating every little task, cleaning up their diplomatic messes. Half the volunteers were barely out of their teens. They didn’t have to worry about saving credits, they were young, all they wanted to save was the galaxy itself. There were plenty of people her age setting the strategies, at least. Some non-humans older than her by halves. She wondered what it would be like to be a sentient sponge, releasing spores and then shrivelling up. She figured it would be rude to ask.

Her best pilot. The best pilot in the galaxy, as he was so happy to tell anyone who would listen. She regretted ever letting those words slip out in the first place. Poe absolutely idolized her, and his face lit up like two suns whenever she paid him any mind. A full on compliment, even if what she said had long been true, proved too much for him to bear. Poe changed overnight. He’d always had the confidence to try new things, to try his best, offer what he had. But now he walked taller, smiled easier, and took bigger risks. She supposed the main change was that Poe Dameron now knew who he was. When he met someone new, he’d shake their hand and make deep eye contact. From his toes up to his tousled hair, his whole body said “I’m the best pilot in the galaxy, and who are you?” Anyone else might have belittled others with the sentiment, but Poe looked at people with wonder. If he could practice and struggle and achieve so much, what was this person - from another planet, another family, culture - what were they capable of? What had they done, and what could they do together? He believed in people, and his power to uplift them. Leia wondered where he’d gotten that from. Taking off his helmet, Poe looked at her with big brown eyes.

**Author's Note:**

> I know this is short, so I invite any reader to continue it. Comments will make my heart swell.


End file.
